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Wednesday 16 March 2016

Learning how to edit: Writing

Sam woke up in the morning. He ate breakfast. There is a competition at the skate park that he wanted to go to. His mum said no and he got angry so he went to his room. He was sad so he got out of his window and went to the park. he saw his friends and said hi. An earthquake happened and monsters come out of the ground. Tevita his friend was eaten by a monster and the monster didn't like him so threw him up I tried to find my mum because she was a superhero to save me. Mum said she was not going to help me because I was naughty so she flew to the moon and then the monsters took over the planet I had to learn how to become a superhero to fight the monsters.


CHECKLIST - Have I checked for...


full stops
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capital letters
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sentences make sense
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used the right tense
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add detail
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Sam’s mum didn’t know that he went out to go to the competition at the skate park. Then she went to his  room and checked if he’s in his room and he wasn’t there and she started getting angry. When he came back home when the competition finished he opened the door and watched TV. His mum came to him and said that why he left his room and why he didn’t listen to her.

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